Tired

[Rianna]

Have you ever been plain and simply tired? Tired of writing because it always comes out whiny? Tired of whining over things you have no control over? Tired of having no control? So tired you want so desperately to scream or hide. Or both.

I'm not certain how effective doing both would be, though. Have you ever tried hiding from someone while screaming? It generally doesn't work all too well. Of course, I have a special room in my mind where I do my screaming. No one hears. No one except the other voices. And sadly, those voices are quite annoyed with the screaming and no longer allow it. They have barred me from the screaming room, and are threatening to lock me in the silent room. Have you ever been in a silent room? A room where not even a whisper is allowed? At least in a library you can whisper or read or otherwise absorb yourself in some form of communication. In my silent room, there is no communication with other voices, or with its own voice. There are no pictures, no sounds, no words. There is nothing.

Such darkness envelopes this room. There are no shadows, as there is no light. There is nothing. No warmth, no coldness. No fear, no joy, no pain, no anger. There is nothing. It is the worst place I have been, and a place I wish to never see again. And yet, the voices keep attempting to draw me there, to tempt me with the darkness. I keep fighting these voices. I keep fighting to stay away from this room. But I grow tired.

I am plain and simply tired...

[James Waters AKA. NineSpeed]

I sometimes feel as if we have all fallen into that dark crevice, and the walls are closing in. I feel it in myself, my community, my world. We struggle and fight to keep our sanity in a world where sanity ceases to have a place. No one cares, not really. Our world has become about "Me". Maybe it has always been that way, and it just seems more obvious now a days.

There are a few still around that try to awaken change. That try to voice the wrongs they see but they are drowned out by those for whom sanity is not desired. Blindly they walk along the edge of the abyss, uncaring. Unwilling to grasp the outstretched hand, slapping it away and laughing in macabre manner.
The gaping maul of destruction bites down upon our innocence, devouring honor, respect, and our moral compass. darkness and despair left in its wake.

Tired? Ya, I resemble that remark.

[Mishka]

I agree... it seems odd that it would be comforting--but I suppose it makes sense... there is no responsibility there, no repercussions... there is no need to try or, really, to BE anything at all... just one with the darkness... And extremely difficult to escape from once settled in, all safe (?) and sound... I do, by the way, like the notion of someone trying to hide while screaming.....

[Rianna]

Ah yes, I do remember that feeling all too well. This comfort is why I avoid (or attempt to avoid) this dark place. This is why I consider it the worst place to be. It is too comfortable. Too comforting. And oh so tempting of a place to take up residence and never leave.

[Mishka]

What gets scary is when the dark silent places become comfortable...